Coming out to your family.
Hi. A while back, I was chronicling the life of a very confused individual. Gender, sexuality, and identity were all at war with each other for the control of two seemingly separate people sharing the same body. I couldn’t do it forever, and so the transition revealed itself. One by one, the walls fell - select coworkers, my poker game, my childhood friends, the hormone pills - I wasn’t two people and my gender was nothing to be ashamed of. People proved to be amazingly accepting and compassionate, until…
You’re too young.
It’s just a phase.
Are you doing this just to fit in?
I’d rather you have told me you’re gay.
Take anti-depressants instead.
You have a self-injury disorder.
You’re a freak.
You’ll never be a real woman.
You’re killing my son.
I can understand why a parent would be upset. Parents generally do want their kids to be healthy and “normal.” Parents generally don’t want their kids to be ostracized or at risk. Parents generally don’t want their kids to reject being the person they raised. But when a mother spews anger at her child, no one wins. There’s no enlightenment to be gained through hatred. I’m not second guessing my decision to go through transition, only my decision to be honest. Luckily, my father was much more sensitive. He said he felt a lot of anger, but reassured me that it was not me personally and just “the way things turned out.”
So now my parents know why I used to be so secretive. Did they really need to?
-Erin
